Kaninang umaga nagkakuwentuhan kami ni best friend Juanita. Sabi nya she wants to die soon. Coming from an alzheimer's patient inisip ko...nasabi nya ba yun kasi lucid moment nya yun?
Inexplore ko ang topic ng death na sinasabi nya.
Tinanong ko kung bakit gusto na niyang mamatay. Sabi niya wala na kasi siyang purpose dito sa mundo. Sabi ko naman...hindi ba ang mga mahal niya sa buhay ay enough reason to live? Sabi niya well oo..then silence.
I think nage-gets ko ang sinasabi rin niya. Although I'm sure nakalimutan na niya ang conversation namin na yun.
Kahit na alam nila na may mga mahal sila sa buhay matatanong mo, what is the purpose of living if you cannot even recall the 60 seconds that had happened in your life? What is the purpose if you cannot even remember the best moments in your life? Where do you go back to and reminisce...sa 30-120 seconds of memory? It's like you're a living dead. Ni hindi nga nila maalala ang pangalan mo kahit na ilang buwan na kayong nagsasama at halos araw-araw na nagkikita.
For their loved ones may purpose ang kanilang existence kasi mahal nila sila...but for these alzheimer and dementia patients? I dont know.
Their situation gave me a glimpse of tomorrow. What if tumanda na rin ako at maging ulyanin, importante pa ba ang mga ginagawa ko ngayon? Mababalikan ko pa ba ang nakaraan ko at mabibigyan ng importansya ang mga naging role ko sa buhay at ang mga natamo ko noon at tatamuin sa kinabukasan?
Nakilala ko na lang ang mga matatanda na ito na mga ulyanin na...mga inutil na kumbaga. Pero sa nakaraan nilang buhay sila ay mga pintor, propesor, magulang, asawa ng isang sikat na boksingero at baseball player, isang magaling na chef, isang babaeng kilala sa alta sosyedad noong araw, etc. Importante pa ba sa kanila ngayon ang lahat ng mga napagdaanan nila? Nababalikan pa ba nila ang lahat ng mga natamo nila sa kanilang buhay? Hindi.
What is the purpose of growing old if you cannot impart the wisdom of your experiences to the younger generation?
Mamatay na lang ako kesa sa magka-alzheimers at dementia ako. Kesa sa tumingin na lang ako sa salamin isang araw at di ko makilala kung sino ako.
1 comment:
hi ate mi!Ü
nkktouch nmn tong entry mo...
it made me think as well.
"What is the purpose of growing old if you cannot impart the wisdom of your experiences to the younger generation?"
i think what you actually realized, which in turn made me understand as well, is the main purpose you're looking for from these kind of people.
sad as it may seem, their current situation is trying to teach us something already.
naniniwala ksi ako na "everyhting has a purpose" sa buhay na to..and it doesn't mean na hndi na nla naalala ung mga nkaraan nla e wlang nging saysay un.dhil through the course of their lives, they have influenced and changed other people's lives already.and they continue to teach things until now depsite their illness.tulad nlng nyang simple conversation nyo, totoo na Juanita might just forget that later on...but the essence of that conversation has affected you and even taught you something about the importance of each moment, knowing that in any time, you might just lose it.
yes, it is painful for us "normal" people to imagine the kind of life that they have.but let's try to see the purpose in everything becuase it would surely make us learn and understand life more.
hooh!kineri mo ba un ate mi???hahah!!!ako hnde!parang sinapian ako!heheh!!!;p
im really glad na shnshare mo samin ung experiences mo jan.Ü
at least, may natutununan din ako khit nsa kabilang panig tau ng mundo...hehe
love you ate mi!!!
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